The Paradox of Faith

I believe there is nothing we can’t attain if we truly have faith in them, though I sometimes feel that “believe” is such a clear-cut word. At least, I know deep down inside I do feel and know that I truly believe in faith.

F.a.i.t.h

Some people might refer it as religion, as believes, as idealism, principle, or even fanaticism; or anything else which somehow perceived as “strong word”, like “power”. When I think of faith, somehow it is automatically connected to goals, targets; yet ironically those words felt “individual”. Half of my thoughts wander in how different they are, yet so similar. Most of the time I do feel that goals or target will most likely lead to misinterpretation to something we “have” to achieve. Whilst, oddly, this obligation on the word “have” is closely related to faith. Even if I want to change the world, I believe I can. I do.

Goals and targets are the preconditions of faith. Are they?

They’re part of my faith, my believes, my power, my self-control, my supremacy, my religion.

For long time, I’ve had my goals, at least I think I know I do have them; doesn’t matter how small, how big, how odd, how unrealistic it might come, how general and how boring it seems, or being interpreted as jokes. 
I have my faith. They’re the ones who kept me alive and alert. The question then, why there are still questions rounding in my head? Why should I feel worry? Anxious? Doubtful? Are these just fragmentation of thoughts? Imagination? Are they? 

They’re now seemed falling apart. Sinking back to the point of having faith beneath faith.

The Loss of a Nation

I remember when I was in elementary school, how we used to study and remembering all of our heroin, histories, Pancasila and Bhineka Tunggal Ika  as our National concept. It is sad now I even can’t remember most of it. I think this is because it somehow just vanishes within our era. Era of technology, a revolution of media, political chaotic.

I was very amazed when I read the history of gender colonialism in Dutch history. Kartini is one good example on how we should fight for our beliefs. Her writing clearly demonstrates liberated visions on gender equality, and women specifically, to have a better access towards education. Such vision was shown in one of her letter “We are not giving battle to men, but to old moss-grown addicts and conventions that are not worthy…”

Talking about education, former vice president Moh Hatta once stated that our challenge after 25years of independence is: How to adjust the education for children, youth, and the people, to meet the country's development needs?. Even when I saw demonstrations, it just felt wrong somehow. People began to question, what are they looking for exactly? Justice? Truth? Freedom of speech? The collateral damages are not worth the efforts. This is just my personal point of view.

We are losing our National identity. Students are talking about social networks; people are talking about money, politics, and position. Girls and young women are arguing about what is the next fashion trend going to be like. Men are worrying about their personal egoistic achievement. Yes, it is true the world is evolving. But we do still need our principles, right?  Otherwise we’ll get lost within our loss.

Maybe we forgot, or even we do not know, that We, ARE the future leaders.

It is our call, to re-shape, and find our lost nation.

Every one of Us is contributing. No exception.

As spelled out by Prof Emil Salim: “What is black is black; white is white; say it as it is..”

L.I.F.E

I can (or might) find answers to questions in terms of life in general (perhaps..). But once, someone asks: “what is your life’s true purpose?” or, “what is your heart’s deepest desire?”.. these, are hard. It’s not that I do not know, it is because I think I know the answer, I just don’t know if it is the right answer or not. As far as I know, these kinds of Qs do not just pop up like that, and we can’t just have some s*itty answer. I know what I want to be, what I want to do, but are they actually my life’s purpose? Or just my egoistic desire to fulfil my place in life itself?

The sad things is, sad sad thing, we are in fact in an era where people are suffering from feelings of disconnection from life’s deeper meaning. Me, you, we, are the people. I just hate the way people are judging life based on what they’ve become, based on what they’ve been through, based on what they achieved, based on something measurable. Maybe the un-measurable things are actually what life is. Maybe, to know what life is, we just have to throw away the “measureable” factors. Like they said, “we can’t control something we can’t measure”. So life become sucks when we just try to control it. I guess. So F*** it.

What can we expect from life? What do we want from life? What can we control from life? These are just wrong wrong questions. Maybe it is the other way around, what can we actually give to life?

Don’t be selfish.
Life is just life.
L.I.F.E