The Paradox of Faith

I believe there is nothing we can’t attain if we truly have faith in them, though I sometimes feel that “believe” is such a clear-cut word. At least, I know deep down inside I do feel and know that I truly believe in faith.


Some people might refer it as religion, as believes, as idealism, principle, or even fanaticism; or anything else which somehow perceived as “strong word”, like “power”. When I think of faith, somehow it is automatically connected to goals, targets; yet ironically those words felt “individual”. Half of my thoughts wander in how different they are, yet so similar. Most of the time I do feel that goals or target will most likely lead to misinterpretation to something we “have” to achieve. Whilst, oddly, this obligation on the word “have” is closely related to faith. Even if I want to change the world, I believe I can. I do.

Goals and targets are the preconditions of faith. Are they?

They’re part of my faith, my believes, my power, my self-control, my supremacy, my religion.

For long time, I’ve had my goals, at least I think I know I do have them; doesn’t matter how small, how big, how odd, how unrealistic it might come, how general and how boring it seems, or being interpreted as jokes. 

I have my faith. They’re the ones who kept me alive and alert. The question then, why there are still questions rounding in my head? Why should I feel worry? Anxious? Doubtful? Are these just fragmentation of thoughts? Imagination? Are they? 

They’re now seemed falling apart. Sinking back to the point of having faith beneath faith.


The Loss of a Nation

I remember when I was in elementary school, how we used to study and remembering all of our heroin, histories, Pancasila and Bhineka Tunggal Ika  as our National concept. It is sad now I even can’t remember most of it. I think this is because it somehow just vanishes within our era. Era of technology, a revolution of media, political chaotic.

I was very amazed when I read the history of gender colonialism in Dutch history. Kartini is one good example on how we should fight for our beliefs. Her writing clearly demonstrates liberated visions on gender equality, and women specifically, to have a better access towards education. Such vision was shown in one of her letter “We are not giving battle to men, but to old moss-grown addicts and conventions that are not worthy…

Talking about education, former vice president Moh Hatta once stated that our challenge after 25years of independence is: How to adjust the education for children, youth, and the people, to meet the country's development needs?. Even when I saw demonstrations, it just felt wrong somehow. People began to question, what are they looking for exactly? Justice? Truth? Freedom of speech? The collateral damages are not worth the efforts. This is just my personal point of view.

We are losing our National identity. Students are talking about social networks; people are talking about money, politics, and position. Girls and young women are arguing about what is the next fashion trend going to be like. Men are worrying about their personal egoistic achievement. Yes, it is true the world is evolving. But we do still need our principles, right?  Otherwise we’ll get lost within our loss.

Maybe we forgot, or even we do not know, that We, ARE the future leaders.
It is our call, to re-shape, and find our lost nation.
Every one of Us is contributing. No exception.
As spelled out by Prof Emil Salim: “What is black is black; white is white; say it as it is..



I can (or might) find answers to questions in terms of life in general (perhaps..). But once, someone asks: “what is your life’s true purpose?” or, “what is your heart’s deepest desire?”.. these, are hard. It’s not that I do not know, it is because I think I know the answer, I just don’t know if it is the right answer or not. As far as I know, these kinds of Qs do not just pop up like that, and we can’t just have some s*itty answer. I know what I want to be, what I want to do, but are they actually my life’s purpose? Or just my egoistic desire to fulfil my place in life itself?

The sad things is, sad sad thing, we are in fact in an era where people are suffering from feelings of disconnection from life’s deeper meaning. Me, you, we, are the people. I just hate the way people are judging life based on what they’ve become, based on what they’ve been through, based on what they achieved, based on something measurable. Maybe the un-measurable things are actually what life is. Maybe, to know what life is, we just have to throw away the “measureable” factors. Like they said, “we can’t control something we can’t measure”. So life become sucks when we just try to control it. I guess. So F*** it.

What can we expect from life? What do we want from life? What can we control from life? These are just wrong wrong questions. Maybe it is the other way around, what can we actually give to life?

Don’t be selfish.
Life is just life.


Factor 10 and MDGs: in a quest for sustainable future

MDGs, we are all aware of, at least most of us have heard the term. But Factor 10? This is new for most of people—or not, since it has been published since 1990s. Factor10 implies that to attain sustainability and environmental protection, we need to reduce resource turn over by 90% on a global scale, within the next 50 years. As such, to achieve that, we have to achieve a decrease in energy use and material flows by a factor of 10, and also an increase in resource productivity/efficiency by a factor of 10. This is a bit extreme, yet it is a part of EU policy (not sure how is the implementation going)

Factor10 and MDGs are both aiming for long-term future directions. Factor10 focuses on energy and resource use reduction. Perhaps it will be hard to be implemented if institutions, privates or governments paralysed it with its short term programs. It can be a part of factor10, in a way of actions towards it. Whereas, MDGs covers almost all aspects, not just environmental-concern issues, which ranging from economic-health-environment-to PPPs. Both, indeed involves certain targets to be achieved, but MDGs covers broader subject-to every country, mainly developing country including Indonesia to reach certain targets in 5 years-time.

Factor10 is now influencing change to a sustainable system of production and consumption. Whilst MDGs is influencing global economic development, to reduce global poverty. If, factor10 is mainly for developed countries and MDGs is for developing countries, so I guess this means that developing countries actually have more influence-global wise?


Musicians vs Scientists

Is there anything in common? In a total different perspective, offcourse. They both have laboratories//recording studios,supervisors//record labels,research projects//EPprojects, formulas--equations//chords, tools—microscopes//guitars. They both are insanely creative and out of the box thinking-mind set. They do not think their occupation as a job, rather something they cannot live without. I don’t think they consider it as an occupation; it is who they are.

There are many musicians who are also scientists, vice versa—but I’m not referring to them here. I’m talking for those who have full time profession as musicians or scientists—if, profession is what they call it. For me, I think, to have both skills—like really true skills—are just genetically impossible, or just probably the most genius person alive (how to use right-and left brain optimally at one time?).

The phenomenon here, is musicians and scientists are in a totally different world, well this is true, but not so much. They both create massive contradictions, ridiculously genius talent (or thoughts)—and seeing from the object; which is science and music; as one say, science is objective, experimental, quantitative; sense experience—indeed all mental experience—is subjective, experiential and qualitative; where music, I think is also experimental, and quantified!. And, if they want to be extremely good at what they’re doing, and to get the acknowledgement from the community, they have to be in a serious-total-dedication. Like, able to bring an alteration to someone’s life.  

But seriously, if u’re stranded in an island, who would you rather be with? Kurt Cobain or Stephen Hawking?  :D

Music and science, both, are revolutions. Long live musicians and scientists!